It's been a little bit since I have had the patience to write. It has been one year since we went to the doctors office and found out that Gabriel no longer had a heart beat. It was 11:10 am that day, and when the moment came today I had already started to have a panic attack. Despite my best efforts, I am reliving every moment. I feel pathetic and weak that I can't muster the strength to pull it together and be stronger than this! I told myself I was going to try and focus on Gabe's life, I wanted these days to be about the memories we do have, the ones I cherish and hold close to my heart. I don't want to let the horrible circumstances surrounding his death trump the beauty of his life.
Despite our best efforts, it would be a lie to say that my marriage has been the bliss it once was. Our passion has been buried somewhere along the way. We have been fighting quite a bit with the approach of his first birthday tomorrow. I know in my heart though, God will see us through and when we come out on the other side of this storm, we will be stronger. Pray for us if you can, pray that we get through this next few days and we can start to move forward in our marriage and life. Even if it is only at a snails pace, progress is progress.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Please be respectful when leaving comments.