Day 7: What To Say
October 7,2012
This one is also self explanatory. It seems to me like the most common thing us angel parents want is to hear our babies names! It may bring tears to our eyes but the beautiful sound of their name brings healing to our broken hearts.
Today I spent most of my time dwelling on the holidays that are fast approaching. Gabriel could have been anything for Halloween....but he won't be dressed in any costume. Last Halloween was when Gary and I got to hear his heartbeat for the first time together. It makes me want to cry, I think about how last Thanksgiving I had just found out he was a healthy boy, I had never felt so appreciative of anything in my entire life! I don't even want to think about Christmas....our very first Christmas in our own home and our beautiful boy isn't here to celebrate?? It seems wrong, and cruel and horrible and twisted and it makes me sick thinking about it!!! And of course comes new years, where we celebrate a new beginning, another year we hope will be full of happiness....I already know it won't be though. And then is Valentines day, with all the adorable "love bug" stuffed animals and candy and kisses and hugs....but I won't be able to hug my cuddle bug, my Gabriel. And before long we will be standing at his one year birthday....these next six months are going to kill me.
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